Normally, I try to inject a bit of humor into my posts here. That’s my “style”, I suppose…but on this particular subject there is very little to make light of. If there is someone in your life that is hurting your, or scaring you by doing what you consider to be “stalking” you…you need to take the appropriate legal steps to keep that individual away from you. This is not a funny subject. If you’re reading this because you are in that situation, I highly encourage you to follow these steps, and seek some help in your situation.

• Seek Help - Visit crisis center or domestic abuse prevention facility in your area and talk to an advocate about filing a restraining order. Please do not attempt to do this on your own…the advocates there will have blank copies of the paper work and they specialize in getting these things through the courts as quickly as possible. They will be of invaluable help to you.
• Read before you sign - Read the paperwork over with your advocate and ask any questions you need.  Make sure you understand what you are filling out.
• Fill Out the Form - Fill out the paperwork completely.
• Show your Evidence - Show your advocate the evidence that you have.  Threating phone messages, bruises, photographs, anything that can help prove your case.
• Follow Instructions - Your advocate will tell you where to go and what to do.  Listen to them and file the paperwork they tell you, where they tell you to do it.
• Wait for the Judge - The judge will look over your file during a break in his/her schedule.  If they are convinced by your argument, they will issue a temporary restraining order called an “Ex Parte”
• Listen and Be Safe - The temporary order does not take affect until the perp is served with papers.  This is statistically the most dangerous time for you, so you MUST listen to the advocate and the police, and take the necessary steps to keep yourself safe.
• Be Prepared - After the individual is served with papers, you must be ready to call 9-1-1 to report ANY violation of the temporary restraining order.  Get copies of the order to anyone who needs to know.  Be it your family, your boss, your childern’s school…make sure they have copies of the paperwork and know to call 9-1-1.
• Wait for the Hearing - A hearing will be held, usually within 10 days, and if the judge is still convinced at that time, a long term restraining order will be issued.

Keep in mind that laws vary from state to state.  Visit the crisis center and your advocate will be able to make sure that you are doing things by the book.

If you’re reading this because you’re in a situation like this.  Please stop reading…pick up the phone, and call the crisis center.  If you’re reached a point where you are scared enough to look this up on the Internet, it may be time to seek help.  That call can’t hurt anything.  Talk to someone and do what’s best for you and your family.