27 Feb
Posted by Alex as Behavior and Ethics, Family

Being a family is accidental. You get born into a group of people without anyone asking you if you wanted to be born to those people in the first place. But staying as a family is the tricky part. This is why solving family issues are very crucial.
One of the most delicate family issues is whether or not your parents are running a favoritism show among their kids. But it only sucks if the favorite isn’t you.
Favoritism happens in a lot of families. The usual most loved among siblings is a toss between the eldest and the youngest. The middle kids are either okay with it or they have the middle child syndrome.
Before you make some life-changing reactions to these seemingly suspicious acts of favoritism, consider these first.
Parents treat their children differently because each child is different from each other. This is ok as long as different does not mean unfair. Sometimes the favored child needs more attention because of poor health. Instead of being mad, try to look at the condition on a brighter side. You’re naturally confident while your sister is deeply insecure. Come to think of it, she might need your support, too.
Don’t let it make you think that you’re unwanted. Sometimes this feeling of being loved less can have a long-lasting effect. It can develop into an attitude problem later on. You might become needy or aloof in your relationship with other people. Children who get over favoritism issues at home tend to lead happier lives and enjoy healthier relationships as they grow older.
3 Responses
Linda
August 27th, 2008 at 1:34 am
1Thanks for the tip. I’m sure you’re right that children who get over favoritism issues in their youth are happier and healthier overall. Of course, in some cases the favoritism goes to an unhealthy extreme though and stretches long into adulthood, right up to the death of the parent and acted out in the will. In those cases, the best way to get out of the ordeal is simply to cut ties early on before tha happens, so the absurdity of it can no longer hurt you. Trust me, that is what is best in these cases.
bea
September 8th, 2009 at 4:57 am
2thanks a lot for these.it had helped me so much for my speech in class.
Laurie
December 30th, 2009 at 9:05 pm
3Agree with Linda. Parents who favor one sibling during their life should be expected to act consistently with that in their will as well. Painful as it is, at some point you need to acknowledge that you may never receive fair treatment or equal standing with your siblings, and if that’s not acceptable to you, you may want to consider cutting the ties. Madonna said in a song that you can only ask for something once or twice. If, after that, you don’t get it, it was never yours in the first place. Just as you would end a marriage that causes too much pain, you should permit yourself to cut ties with blood relatives who do the same. Don’t hang on hoping for the acknowledgement to come at the last minute. It hardly ever does.
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